From: user on
On 22 Oct 2007 19:05:00 -0700, Banty <Banty_member(a)newsguy.com> wrote:
> In article <1193090992.803392.54620(a)e34g2000pro.googlegroups.com>, Kristina
> says...
>>
>>On Oct 21, 8:53 am, Banty <Banty_mem...(a)newsguy.com> wrote:
>
>>> You know what helped me as a single mom of a six year old (as well as him)?
>>>Getting involved in Cub Scouts. Not only did it give him a set of activities
>>>every week and month that six year olds love and a bunch of friends, but it also
>>>gave ME a good look at what actual young boys really act like. That will also
>>> give you contacts with other parents with boys your age. For friends for him
>>> from generally good families attentive and involved with their kids, and for
>>> advice for you.
>>>
>>> And really beware of the sefl-fulfilling prophecy effect. Behavior from a
>>>perfectly normal six year old, not knowing that history, would be dismissed as a
>>> six year old with a lot of energy, knowing that history, he can barely act or
>>> speak without people thinking of that history. So I would leave that thought
>>> behind. The only person that needs to worry about all of that would be his
>>> physician should he ever need any evaluation.
>>>
>>>But first get an energy outlet for him and a level-setting experience for you -
>>> get him into Cub Scouts (he would start as a Tiger).
>>>
>>> Banty
>>
>>THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU! I have been racking my brain for some
>>time now on programs for 6yr old boys. Considering I don't know many
>>people with 6yr old boys that actually care what is going on with
>>their children, it's hard for me to come up with anything. My husband
>>has suggested sports and not that that's a bad idea but right now my
>>son doesn't really have an interest in sports. How do I go about
>>getting him into the cub scouts? No one knows about his biological
>>father, everyone thinks my husband is his father and I plan to keep it
>>that way. My son knows, my husband knows and the biological father
>>knows and that's all that we need to know. I TRULY APPRECIATE THE
>>SUGGESTION and any others that you may have. Thank you for not
>>attacking me like some responses I have gotten.
>>
>
> http://www.joincubscouting.org/
>
> Then call your local council.
>
> And you're welcome :)
>


Well... unless either the child or the parent is a professed
atheist, in which case you'll be kicked out. Been there, done
that, in the last month. ( Bitter? Who? Me? )

If that's the case, I'd suggest that the OP try to see if
there's anything like the YMCA Adventure Guides in her area,
which are very similar to BSA in many respects, except that
the YMCA program, ironically enough, happily embraces people
from all faiths and walks of life.

- Rich
From: Banty on
In article <slrnfhsnie.7od.Rich(a)zippy.mulveyfamily.com>, user says...
>
>On 22 Oct 2007 19:05:00 -0700, Banty <Banty_member(a)newsguy.com> wrote:
>> In article <1193090992.803392.54620(a)e34g2000pro.googlegroups.com>, Kristina
>> says...
>>>
>>>On Oct 21, 8:53 am, Banty <Banty_mem...(a)newsguy.com> wrote:
>>
>>>> You know what helped me as a single mom of a six year old (as well as him)?
>>>>Getting involved in Cub Scouts. Not only did it give him a set of activities
>>>>every week and month that six year olds love and a bunch of friends, but it also
>>>>gave ME a good look at what actual young boys really act like. That will also
>>>>give you contacts with other parents with boys your age. For friends for him
>>>>from generally good families attentive and involved with their kids, and for
>>>> advice for you.
>>>>
>>>> And really beware of the sefl-fulfilling prophecy effect. Behavior from a
>>>>perfectly normal six year old, not knowing that history, would be dismissed as a
>>>>six year old with a lot of energy, knowing that history, he can barely act or
>>>>speak without people thinking of that history. So I would leave that thought
>>>> behind. The only person that needs to worry about all of that would be his
>>>> physician should he ever need any evaluation.
>>>>
>>>>But first get an energy outlet for him and a level-setting experience for you -
>>>> get him into Cub Scouts (he would start as a Tiger).
>>>>
>>>> Banty
>>>
>>>THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU! I have been racking my brain for some
>>>time now on programs for 6yr old boys. Considering I don't know many
>>>people with 6yr old boys that actually care what is going on with
>>>their children, it's hard for me to come up with anything. My husband
>>>has suggested sports and not that that's a bad idea but right now my
>>>son doesn't really have an interest in sports. How do I go about
>>>getting him into the cub scouts? No one knows about his biological
>>>father, everyone thinks my husband is his father and I plan to keep it
>>>that way. My son knows, my husband knows and the biological father
>>>knows and that's all that we need to know. I TRULY APPRECIATE THE
>>>SUGGESTION and any others that you may have. Thank you for not
>>>attacking me like some responses I have gotten.
>>>
>>
>> http://www.joincubscouting.org/
>>
>> Then call your local council.
>>
>> And you're welcome :)
>>
>
>
> Well... unless either the child or the parent is a professed
>atheist, in which case you'll be kicked out. Been there, done
>that, in the last month. ( Bitter? Who? Me? )

Well, I don't think Kristina will have that problem.

BTW, I'm agnostic, my son leans toward atheism. Religion simply hasn't come up,
and he's now working on Star Scout.

You got kicked out? What happened?

Banty

From: Chris on
On Oct 23, 9:37?am, "Donna Metler" <dmmet...(a)xxxcomcast.net> wrote:
> "Chris" <chrissype...(a)aol.com> wrote in message
>
> news:1193110315.070050.182410(a)z24g2000prh.googlegroups.com...
>
>
>
> > It's disappointing these days that teachers will actually send out an
> > e-mail to all parents of students that reads something like "Send in
> > pics for our sports board, and oh by the way, I need you to speak to
> > your children about how noisy they have been lately in the classroom
> > and while walking in the halls. I'm thinking I'll need to send home
> > blue-notes if it doesn't improve."
>
> > Blue notes? Go ahead. At least the kids will see you mean business.
> > I'm wondering what ever happened to the teacher that switched off the
> > lights when the class got loud that gave that "look" that put the fear
> > of God into ya who made you put your head down on your desk until
> > order could be restored while you thought about what it was she
> > wanted, or the teacher who turned her class around from walking down
> > the hall to gym class, lunch, or recess, because they did not do it
> > the "right" way (the right way being in an orderly and quiet fashion),
> > or the teacher who singled out the unruly kids by placing them in the
> > front or back of the room. kwim?
>
> In some schools, the teacher who does this will be reprimanded for
> "inappropriate use of time", or told that they're being emotionally abusive
> because they've singled out a child for behavior-because, DYK, the kids are
> just supposed to DO these things, not be TAUGHT them. Then the principal
> wonders why behaviors escalate.
>
> As a teacher, I had three principals who were supportive on discipline and
> allowed "Old School" methods (not including spanking), and two who were
> touchy, feely, discipline through love (and apparently never tell a child
> they were doing anything wrong) people.
>
> Guess which two schools had situations so bad the police had to be called
> in-remembering that the OLDEST child in these schools was about 13!- Hide quoted text -
>
> - Show quoted text -

That may be the case, but since I've seen both in our school, it must
not be an issue there. As for children not responding to authority,
the entire classroom would not be suffering from the syndrome, so an
entire class wouldn't be an issue, and if it is, then chances are it
is the teacher. I had dealt with a first-grade teacher who was sooo
scatterbrained.....every time I bopped in, the class was in dissarray,
she had student helpers, parents helpers, older student helpers, and
everyone was loud and disorderly. The last time I 'bopped" in was for
an after-school meeting we had arranged, and as I stood in the doorway
in the hall, she held up a finger and said "It isn't always like this!
Can I talk to you for a minute?" I said "Ummm, I AM here for our
meeting." and she looked confused and I was so so darned close to
saying "Really, is this just always for my benefit then?" @@

From: Chris on
On Oct 21, 2:05?pm, Chris <chrissype...(a)aol.com> wrote:
> ?In
>
> > school he does his work and pays attention and even is a great helper
> > but his teacher has called me several times in regards to his
> > behavior. He plays with his materials, he talks out of turn, he just
> > seems to think that although the teacher and I speak frequently and we
> > are on the same page (we both tell him the same thing about learning
> > and why he goes to school-the whole 9) he is going to do what he wants
> > to do anyway. Like I said before my son is a GREAT kid
> > and he's loving and is respectful but when he's in school he just
> > wants to act a damn fool.
>
> Sounds like most of the 6-y/o's I know. You need to really evaluate
> the situation with the teacher. It sounds as though your son needs a
> teacher who can get through to him what consequences are in HER
> classroom. A 6-y/o is smart enough to know how far he can take things
> and with whom - changing from situation to situation. When a teacher
> softly says "Son, what is the class doing right now?" "What should you
> be doing now?" or offers gentle reminders, they are all really
> acceptable to some kids. Afterall, the teacher doesn't seem miffed and
> doesn't seem to mind offering all of these reminders. Yet, if that
> teacher were willing to be more firm, instead of expecting that YOU
> can make the difference for HER expectations IN HER classroom, she
> would get much farther and you would see a huge improvement. Tell that
> teacher that you are not opposed to your child being sent to the
> office for a stern talking to, for a sit-out of recess as a
> consequence, etc. and watch how quickly your child gets the gentle
> messages that are being offered to him today about what is and what is
> not considered acceptable by that teacher.

If you are interested in hearing a very, very long story about a boy
who sounds like your son, loving, happy-go-lucky, labeled as a comic,
etc. whose parents were told by preschool teachers "I'm going to miss
him. I wish I could follow him through the rest of his education
because I think he's really going to be somebody." who wound up two
years later getting reamed at home every night by frustrated parents
trying to help the teacher get her desired results of him not speaking
out of turn, not speaking too much (overparticipation), doing what was
asked the first time, etc. by getting grounded, having favorite toys
taken away as a punishment, etc. to the point the child asked "Where
are we going" when picked up from school to be evaluated by a doctor
and then when told "We are going to go see the doctor to talk a bit
about the problems you are having at school." he said "Are they going
to operate on my brain?" and started crying....who eventually wound up
having some teachers willing to look past the bad habits formed in
prior years by the inadequacies of prior teachers to completely
resolve the imaginary situation to where the child's parents are now
told "Great job mom on raising such a wonderful, smart, and happy
little boy.", just e-mail me privately. It's a doozy. lol.

From: Sarah Vaughan on
user wrote:
[...]
> Page 4 on this version of the form: http://www.scouting.org/forms/28-102.pdf
>
> "Excerpt from the Declaration of Religious Principle
> The Boy Scouts of America maintains that no member can grow into the best kind of citizen without recognizing an obligation to God and, therefore, recognizes the religious element in the training of the member, but it is absolutely nonsectarian in its attitude toward that religious training. Its policy is that the home and the organization or group with which the member is connected shall give definite attention to religious life. Only persons willing to subscribe to this Declaration of Religious Principle and to the Bylaws of the Boy Scouts of America shall be entitled to certificates of membership."

(What is it with the formatting? This looked fine in the initial post,
but now I'm replying to it and it just seems to be one long run-on line.
My apologies if it's showing up like that in anyone else's posts.)

Anyway. Hmmm. Awkwardly ambiguous.

When they say 'subscribe to this Declaration of Religious Policy', do
they only mean the bit in the immediately preceding sentence about the
home giving 'definite attention to religious life'? If so, then that
would be fine with me, as an atheist. It doesn't say that you have to
*practice* the religious life. Given that religion is an important part
of society and culture, I certainly think my son should grow up giving
definite attention to religious life, even if it's only attention to the
fact that some people have these beliefs that Mummy and Daddy don't and
thought about how we can/should respect beliefs that aren't ours. (And
I'd also like him to give some thought to *why* he believes whatever he
ends up believing. I would not be too keen on him growing into the kind
of person who doesn't give issues any consideration before assuming a side.)

Or... does it mean that you have to subscribe to the belief they state
at the start of the paragraph that 'no member can grow into the best
kind of citizen without recognizing an obligation to God'? Because if
that's what they mean, then the hell with that - I would certainly *not*
want my son subscribing to such a philosophy, or teach him that it was
appropriate.


All the best,

Sarah
--
http://www.goodenoughmummy.typepad.com

"That which can be destroyed by the truth, should be" - P. C. Hodgell